i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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