i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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