I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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