Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
wow bdsm is so cute
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
