we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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