i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
