Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize