I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
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we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
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That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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