two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
