areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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