Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
