whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
