Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize