I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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