His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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