she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
so much tequila, so little girl.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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