...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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