no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
