so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Randomize