Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
