he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize