My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize