I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
