You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
