: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Randomize
