he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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