So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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