Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
