wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize