We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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