She is in my trunk
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
