Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
