9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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