Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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