Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
