i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Randomize
