Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
