he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
