Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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