exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
