no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
operation harelip BJ is a go
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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