I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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