Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
