I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize