It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos