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On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
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