At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize