wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
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I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
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Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
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