coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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