Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
