my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
